Monday, February 26, 2007


Once again, Drew nails it.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

sorry...gotta do it


I put my iTunes player on shuffle, and this is what i got:

Opening Credits: "Baroque" Hoedown - The Cadets of Bergen County

Waking Up: Dirt Work - Slimm Calhoun & Big Boi

First Day At School: Concerning the UFO Sighting Near Highland, Illinois - Sufjan Stevens

Falling In Love: Political Science (Randy Newman cover) - Pedro the Lion

First Kiss: Trials - Twothirtyeight

Fight Song: Needles and Pins - Deftones

Breaking Up: In the Waiting Line - Zero 7 (Garden State)

Prom: Ashes of American Flags - Wilco

Life: Immersed - Jason Truby

Mental Breakdown: Soon Forget - Pearl Jam

Driving: All That Is Good (live) - Five Iron Frenzy

Flashback: Tell Me Now - Mazzy Star (Batman Forever)

Getting Back Together: Elsewhere - Sarah McLachlan

Wedding: Way Away - Toad the Wet Sprocket

Birth of Child: Ozona & Sonora - The Gloria Record

Final Battle: Nancy (With the Laughing Face) - Frank Sinatra

Death Scene: Follow Me - P.O.D.

Funeral Song: Hands Are Tied - Gin Blossoms

End Credits: Cantaloop (Flip Fantasia) - US3
I must admit, I have aweSOME songs. But none of them fit with the stories. But still, I would listen to that songlist OVER and OVER and OVER. (OH and how aweSOME is it that my first song was by a pro marching band? very.)

for lent, i have given up carbs. needles to say , i am very hungry. (i will spell needless how i want - 9:15pm, 2/22) it's funny, when i ask people if they have GIVEn UP anything for lent, they look at me as if i just asked them, "what face do you make when you are struggling to back one out?" GOD FORBID anyone who is not a catholic participate in an activity of catholic PERSUASION. giving up carbs for lent also gives me some assistance in my diet and weightloss. i've been going to the gym for almost two months, and i'm not really seeing any progress, even though the scale in the locker room says i lost 49lbs in 68 and a half minutes.

last note: justin timberlake, the man who just wants to love you, baby, and whoM also just happened to bring sexy back (where it was, i don't know), is COMING to this area soon. ANYway, long story short(er), the commercial COMES on every 48 seconds, and i'm already tired of that song. SEXY HASN'T BEEN GONE, JACKASSthatusedtobeinnsync.

ps - jim halpert is in serious. trouble.

next issue: lovey dovey dinner date, boned over taxes, and anybody hiring for a man-servant? plus Dwight is hosting SNL. seeya!

Thursday, February 15, 2007

the kids are stupid

and by "kids," i mean "high schoolers."

oh and by "stupid," i mean "OH. MY. GOD. WHAT. ARE. THEY. DOING. IN. SCHOOL."

1. best buy - i was looking for tv shows on sale, which were there the week before. i go to the service desk. i ask the girl:

me - "how often do the tv shows go on sale?"
her - "oh, about twice a year."
me - "really?! well...ok."
her - "yeah. about once every three months or so."

i pause to let the stupidity resonate in your head.


2. (the rest of these stories come from my friends' school) a girl in my friend rodger's class actually raised her hand and said "do people in spanish speaking countries like south africa drink yellow soda?"

3. a girl in my friend angela's class actually did not know the seasons. angela says, "well, soandso, there's summer. that's when we aren't in school. fall is when the leaves fall from the trees. winter is when it's cold, and spring is when everything grows again." (i can't imagine having to say that to a high schooler) so the girl calmly replies, "so...when is autumn?"

i fear for the future of this country.

studio 60 is aweswome. the office is awesome. scrubs is awesome. 30 rock is awesome. heroes has gone downhill, and honestly, it's jeph loeb's fault. he is sub-par. his comics are only decent. smallville is a joke, and now heroes is spiraling down.

anyway, studio 60. i'm so freaking addicted to this show. during my breaks at work i look up articles and stuff about the show. i'm GENUINELY concerned that they are going to cancel the show. but the best part is the stuff i'm learning. everytime they mention any plays or authors, i look them up on wikipedia. august strindberg. look back in anger. the hollywood blacklist. i think i'm going crazy. if i do ever move to LA to be a famous actor (read: "respected thespian"), i wanna be on that show.

ok this post is kinda pointless, so i'm gonna...i'm gonna...i'm gonna GO!

Sunday, February 11, 2007


Oh yeah baby. Police reunion on the Grammys tonight.

First, a good story or two.

1. Two Saturday nights ago, before I went to bed, I was reading a comic book about zombies. Inside scoop, zombies scare the hell out of me, but this book is really good, mostly about the people, not the biters. Anyways, Sunday morning, I was brushing my teeth, I set my tooth brush down and reach for a towel. In doing so I knock my toothbrush off the counter. It lands on the floor and begins to vibrate loudly and SPIN IN A CIRCLE! People this is a regular toothbrush. I’ve had it about four months, no vibrating and no SPINNING IN A CIRCLE. It’s a regular toothbrush. It’s not big, it doesn’t have a detachable head. It’s a toothbrush. Apparently they are making regular-looking toothbrushes into SONICtoothbrushes. But reading about zombies, and then watching your TOOTHBRUSH spin around on its own, is not the best.
2. Last Monday night, I was asleep on the couch before Heroes and Studio 60 (the GREATEST SHOW EVER) came on, and I heard a gentle rapping on the door (rap like "knock," not rap like "NWA"). I groggily (yeah I made it up) answered the door to find a cute little old lady. “I hit your car,” she said in a small voice. I zombie out to my car to find...nothing. No dent in the bumper, no nothing. Just a crack that was already there. After quite a few minutes, I convince her that I don’t care. She says that if anything ends up happening, get in touch with her. Fast forward to late Tuesday night. Dottie tries to open my door after the songwriters guild, and it won’t open. So she pulls harder and there’s a loud BANG! And now there’s a dent in my door and I realize there’s more damage than I knew about. There are cracks in my quarterpanel which was pushed back into my passenger side door so that it wouldn’t open. Now I’ve gotta put my shop in the car. I mean my car in the shop.

Hopefully, my work is gonna pony up soon, cuz they are pissing me off. I’m doing all the work, taking all the responsibility, but not getting the money and keep getting my legs swiped out from under me by the higher ups. I mean, I’m actually signing the leave requests for other TEMPS. Other temps like ME. Ugh.

Next story: The Lovey Dovey Dinner Date. (ha. i typed Dover. thanks K.)


Friday, February 2, 2007

whilST a new blog is circling the bowl...

Toothpaste for dinner has been killing lately.

How To Care For a Hamster:

Road Rage Practice:

please be patient with me. despite what sean watkins says, everyday is not a waltz.