Saturday, January 13, 2007

Fear and Tremble Before!....

THE AWESOME!

*shudder*

I now speak to you from The Awesome, an eight-pound beast of fury! A machine of monstrous proportions! Able to exhume thousands of mp3's without batting a byte! More powerful than my last three machines put together! The Awesome lays waste to all it sees before it, and women and children and internet sites tremble at the mere whisper of his name. Can you hear it?

The AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Behold! One hundred and SIX gigs of harddrive. OnePOINTtwo gigs of RAM. At present, The Awesome holds 179 hours, 46 minutes, and 48 seconds of music. The Awesome could entertain me musically for over seven DAYS, and ne'er play the same track twice! And LO, The Awesome doth possess FINGERPRINT SCANNING, for security measures to protect his humble owner. For The Awesome does love me. And I love The Awesome.

Hmm. Maybe I should have just said, "Hey guys I got a new laptop. Oh and bytheway The Awesome is a lush."

Cheers.

PS - The Awesome would like for me to make it known that he does not produce pictures of butterflies. Or kittens. Or, um...flowers and stuff. He does BOMBS! SWORDS! MUSCLES! HOT I-PODS! (that's for him) HE'S A MAN, MAN!

6 comments:

Kristen said...

Like I said, you have one of those lecherous laptops. The kind of flashy, charming computer that breaks the hard-drives of less-trendy, aging desktops like my poor Dell. You seriously need to think about having a discussion with The Awesome about...protection. I mean, he'll be going along fine, chatting up all those cute HPs and Macs and whatnot and then bam!, he catches a virus from some whorish old Apple II who will share files with ANYone and mercilessly spams the computers that don't call the next day. If you don't talk to your computer about safe file-sharing and electronically transmitted diseases (ETDs), then who will?

k.o.

Bree said...

Yes, but can it DANCE? XD

Hae said...

I have 51 DAYS of music on The Badass. Eat that. ;)

patrick | steed said...

I happen to know that you didn't name your computer that until you saw that mine had a name. LAME!

Also, I will catch you and when I do...YOU won't know!

Wait...DANGIT!

Jo said...

See...now look what you did! The Mediocre was perfectly content until you had to brag about The Awesome. Now he's whining about upgrades and fitting in with all the cooler laptops. Way to go, Pat. ;) Thanks.

Thister said...

Hahah! I just got a new laptop too. I (heart) my MacBook Pro.