Thursday, December 15, 2005

rain, rain, go...

actually, rain, stay as long as you want. have a cup of coffee.

sometimes, i really think it rains on purpose. you know, the clouds see you and what you are thinking and decide, "i'm gonna make it worse." and so it rains.

good job, cumulus clouds.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Dangeresque 2!!

This time, it's not Dangeresque 1 !!!

Ah, good times.

Issue 1: LinkSys Sucks (Or, the Weekend in Which I Kept Regal Cinemas in Business)
So, on Friday, the movie I've been waiting for my entire life, opened in theaters across the nation. Now, of course, I am very excited about this. Though not nearly excited enough to dress up for the occasion, like some nerds I saw. You know, this isn't Star Wars or Harry Potter. Geez. So I went to the 7pm showing (awesome), and then I was going to the 10:15, but the girls I was going with decided they wanted to see Walk the Line, which I also wanted to see, and we did. Also awesome.

Then Saturday, a friend from out of town was here to see R&A and Narnia, so we went to the Matinee. And then tonight, I began Stealth, and will finish before the night is over. So, four movies. Oh and LinkSys sucks because their crap doesn't work in our house.

NARNIA IS GREAT!! Many people are disappointed because it's not all dark and broody like LOTR. Well it's not supposed to look like that, you dumbass! Narnia is a children's story. Yes, there were a few things I didn't like, but a VERY few. The biggest was, of course, the changing of Fenris Ulf's name to MauGrim. That was dumb, and it actually sounds like they are trying to make him from Middle Earth. Also, they had Tumnus say the second-most powerful line from the book, and put it at the end of the movie, when it was actually Mr. Beaver, and he said it in his home. AND they left out the most poignant line from the book. "Is he safe?" "IS HE SAFE? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King." That was all Mr. Beaver, and it was all in his house. But still, the movie VERY closely followed the book, and for that I'm happy. It followed much more than LOTR did.

One thing is was worried about, though. I'm an advocate of the old order. I have always read the Chronicles in the order in which they were originally written and published (Wardrobe, Caspian, Dawn Treader, Chair, Horse, Magician, Battle). And I love it. But of course, now, they print them chronologically (Magician, Wardrobe, Horse, Caspian, Dawn Treader, Chair, Battle), and I think this is stupid. Rodger even says that they are CLAIMING that Lewis wanted them read chronologically, but I don't believe that. The original order adds mystery. I love reading 5 books BEFORE I find out how the lamp-post got there, or how Professor Kirke fits into the story. The original order is great. Chronological is boring. I actually tried the Chronological thing once. ME. It was awful. I got bored. I stopped. ME. I actually got bored with the Chronicles. I'm embarassed just to say it. I've read those books every summer since I was eight. Yes, that means almost 20 times. (Next year will be 20) So I was worried that they were going to make the movies in chronological order, but that would be dumb. Wardrobe is by far the most popular book, so it makes sense. But are they going to keep going with the original order, or are they going to be morons and go to The Magician's Nephew next? Time will tell. Or IMDB will tell. Hmm, good point. I'll be right back.

Ok, so no soup for me. There's nothing about it. But I did read some reviews. They were as I suspected. Overall, I wish that Disney hadn't done Narnia. They under-do everything. I think if New Line or someone else had done it, it would have been perfect. Disney sucks. But, the movie was still good, and I'm going to see it again Wednesday.

Issue 2: The New Car (Or, the Day in which Patrick spent $1500 dollars)
Tomorrow I am traveling to Columbia to hopefully purchase a car. 1994 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme. It's a pretty cool car, 11 years old, 105,000 miles. Hopefully it's in good shape. I'm taking Jeff and he knows a lot about cars and buying them, so I feel good about the whole thing. Say a prayer and keep your fingers crossed.

Issue 3: Scrubs
I've just watched the first 8 episodes of Scrubs. I had forgotten why I love that show so much. It's extremely well written and EXTREMELY well played. The show stealer is John C. McGinley, the sarcastic, quick-witted Dr. Cox. If you haven't ever seen it, or you haven't watched it in a while, go rent season 1 and start all over again. Now that I have finished my Friends collection, it's time to start on Scrubs.

Issue 4: X-Men 3 Trailer
Apple.com. QuickTime. Trailers. X-Men 3. Watch it. Gasp. Colossus. Iceman. Juggernaut. Kitty Pride. Calisto. BEAST (perfect choice, that Kelsey Grammar). Angel. Jubilee. Omega Red. Multiple Man. EMMA FROST. Oh, and I won't spoil the last one. Just go watch it, fool.

PJ out.

Saturday, December 3, 2005

R.I.P. Pat-Mobile (1994-2005)

So yeah, some girl pulled out in front of me as she was trying to get into the mall. And now my car is gone. Destroyed. Pictures to come soon. It's sad. Today I had to go get all of my stuff out of my car and say goodbye to it, and I cried a little. I love my car. I miss my car. I was apologizing to it for not keeping it cleaner, and thanking it for saving my life. My car's life was cut short, and I will miss it dearly. :(

Um, so wednesday was the worst day ever. I woke up and my sinuses were KICKING. I couldn't breathe, and my stomach was cramping. I only slept for 4 hours the night before, and so I was already off to a bad start. Then, right at the end of the work day, I cut my right index finger to the cartilage. And so then I left work, picked up my comic books, FILLED UP MY GAS TANK, and then had a wreck. And so for the past three days I have driving around in a 15-passenger van that says "buckle up for Jesus." (see my march 4 blog for more on this van)

Thursday was great though. A bunch of friends and I decided to have Thanksgiving dinner, a week late. 11 people, 14 items of food. It was GRANDE. I love living in my house.

Word up to my girl, Jen. I am on the phone with her right now. We are talking about making my ex jealous, which is pretty funny. My nickname for Jen is "the Voice," or "la voce" in some other language, which I may have made up. Vox is her Italian name. I also just called her "O Beautiful One." I love to stroke Jen's ego every once in a while. She has, quite possibly, the best singing voice on the planet. I watch American Idol and think, "man, they suck compared to LA VOCE." I am, honestly, in love with her. She has always been the one. The love of my life. Actually, she is telling me what to type. But I do love her. And she is mean to her cat.

Also, there were three people who commented on my last post, whom I don't know, and who are kinda scary. Who are you people? Oh, and Will, sorry I didn't call you and tell you about my wreck.

Everyone please pray that they give me a good settlement for my car, because whatever they give me is what I have to spend on a new car. So, you know...

Tomorrow, Georgia is playing LSU for the SEC Championship, so, of course, go Dags.

PS...this is what this part of the alphabet would look like if Q and R were eliminated.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

HUUUFFF-TAAAAAAAAA

i'm so fat from thanksgiving that i can't even reach the keyboard. i had to get somebody else to type this.

i will be back on soon. no computers at the house right now. my slacker roommate still hasn't come back from thanksgiving. i KNOW.

btw, season 10 of friends...ZANG!

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

AAAALLLLLLLLLLLL-righty then!

La-hooo, sa-herrrrrr.

Back in the house, in full effect! Two turntables and a pentium 4 processor. Let's catch up, shall we?

Went to see Switchfoot, saw Eisley, fell in love with Chauntelle, the guitarist. I hope she's over 18, cuz if not, then EWWWWW.

P.O.D. released The Warriors EP, Vol 2. If you are into heavier music, then you should pick up this prequel to thier January LP (I think that one is called Teatro del Ghetto). I love P.O.D. and they are one of my favorite bands in the world.

Been listening to a lot of The Postal Service lately. Even my classic-rock-loving roommate digs them, and that's saying something. Check them out.

Saw the Goblet of Fire yesterday. Today I was making a list in my mind of ways in which I could have made it better. Yet, it's still great, and I recommend it to all. And no, Satan does not jump out and kill you at the end.

There's a possibility I will be getting hired on permanently at work after the new year. This would be awesome: fun job (instead of what I do now), better pay (possible $3/hr more), and only five days a week. Word.

Rodger and I have been jamming and writing songs. Please buy our cd when we make it big, because it will be better than 95% of the crap out there.

Andrew and I went up to Athens this past Saturday to the Georgia game, and met up with his friends Charlie and Christian. I haven't had that much fun in a LONG time. Oh, and Georgia won 45-13 and clinched a spot in the SEC championship game.

I finally got to go and hang out with my new nephew, Mitchell. He rocks, and he has long skinny legs and big feet. My brother is now wondering if perhaps Uncle Pat is actually "Dad."

Lastly, I get three days off this week, and they are all paid, so I get to go spend quality time with my family. Honestly, I am partially wishing I could stay here and be with my friends, because my family is stressful, but I wouldn't trade it for the world, and I am excited.

Alright, that's a mouthful for one night. Happy Monday.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

sorry charlie

i haven't posted cuz our internet is down. it will be back up soon, and i'll be roxxors-zing your boxxers-zing.

Friday, November 11, 2005

Happy Birthday, Mitchell Andrew

Mitchell, my nephew, was born today at about 12:45. He weighs a little over six pounds, and he doesn't look anything like his father, which we are all grateful for. Pictures and more info to follow.

And if you haven't heard of Eisley yet, look them up and buy their crap. It's good. So good, in fact, that they have moved into my all time top 10 (which is actually now numbering 18).

Thursday, November 10, 2005

FREE TIBET!!*

*With the purchase of one country of equal or greater value. Prices and participation may vary.

Will has that t-shirt, and it is quite frankly the funniest t-shirt ever.

That's all I wanted to say.

Thursday, November 3, 2005

More Top 5 fun

Here's a new top 5 for you:

Top 5 things you are actually going to try to accomplish before you are dead.
1. Write a novel
2. Make an album
3. Write a comic book
4. Travel the european countryside
5. Assassinate someone

I was gonna do a question about the five most annoying things in the world and all of my answers were gonna be "my roommate's girlfriend."

Have fun! Talk to you later.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

H-E-double hockey sticks


to ^^ with my job

it's stupid. i'm 27. i shouldn't have to put up with crap. i'm looking for another job. i only stayed with this one because I was all-but-promised a promotion and raise, and now that's gone. i'm kinda excited. i hate working at 6 am.

so will told me that ELIZABETHTOWN is a "pat" movie, and therefore I will be seeing it very soon. and THE WEATHERMAN also. oh, and andrew just called and said that FOUR BROTHERS is at the dollar theater, so there you go.

recently, i have been listening to disc 2 of "Lost Dogs" by Pearl Jam. i blogged about this cd earlier. it freaking rules! (*wow, just now as i was going back and looking for that link, i read over a few blogs, and MAN...my blogs from Aug 3 to about mid-september kicked ASS. so, you know, go back and read them and be amazed). and now i have to ask myself, why have my blogs been infrequent and sucky lately? i think it's because i'm not happy. i mean, there are good things going on in my life that make me happy, but overall, i fell kinda sucky. job sucks, diet sucks, etc. i need to make a turnaround. here goes.

WHOA. ok. i feel better. now i'm gonna go shhhhhhhower and go hang out with andrew. love you.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Alright! Bloggy time!!!

Bullet points of what's been going on:

  • Opening weekend of deer season was this past weekend. I went Saturday, all day, and saw nothing. So all you deer lovers can rest easy.
  • I am officially dieting and exercising, so I am going to be continually grumpy. Don't worry I will try to keep it down to a minimum here.
  • I am going to see Switchfoot on November 5 and Matisyahu and Pigeon John on November 7. I'm so excited, I may pee a little bit.
  • I got the DVD of the entire SERIES of the television show SportsNight. It was a three-time emmy-winning show that ran for two seasons in 1998-1999. It was one of the best shows of all time, and has something for everybody.
  • I'm going to sell all my DVD's. Well, I'm gonna sell about 3/4ths of them. I'm keeping all my seasons of Friends, SportsNight, and my favorite movies. I've just decided that I like all these movies, but there's no sense in mee keeping them because I never watch them and have a lot of money sunk into them. (If you are interested I will post a list on here later)
  • COMIC BOOKS. I've gone crazy for comic books. Absolutely crazy. I may be in serious trouble.
  • I need my computer in my bedroom fixed. A buddy of mine was supposed to come over and look at it, but he ditched me. My two nerdy roommates couldn't even figure it out, so apparently it's a serious problem.
  • I'm going to be an uncle in about three weeks. I'm already an Aunt (Lilly Grace turns three in January), and Mitchell will be born in about mid-November. Good times. I think I will never see my brother again once that happens.
  • I love Ju Mi.(update: i do NOT. 1/18/09.)(nor did i at the time.)
  • I wish I could get this girl to go out with me, but I am a serious coward. What is my problem, you ask? I get discouraged to easily. Plus, this girl rocks, so that double nerves.
  • I just found out tonight that a good friend of mine blew town earlier this week and no one knows where he is, not even his parents. I'm kinda worried about him and I'm praying that he's not in trouble.
  • Upon further review, the new Dave Matthews Band cd is extremely excellent.
  • I really want the White Sox to win the world series, and not just because I loathe Houston (the city).
  • I can pretty much use conscientious however I want. Suckers.
  • My number 1 roommate finally got rid of this girl he was stupidly going out with, and none of us could possibly be more ecstatic.
  • My number 4 roommate needs to decide what he wants out of the relationship that he is in. And soon.
  • My number 3 roommate is engaged. They both rule and after December 31, we will be looking for someone to un-vacate his vacated room.
  • Georgia got a lot of injuries this weekend and barely beat a crappy team. If we don't get those players back, no way we beat Florida. Or Auburn. Or Alabama. Or play for a national championship.

Well, I'm back to blogging. So everybody better keep up. I'm off to watch desperate housewives.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Yes, I am a comment whore

At least I'm conscientious of it.

If nothing else, I finally got Bree to comment again.

I've got a lot going on right now. I'm busy and poopy. Figurative poopy, not literal poopy.

I love everybody. I will do a real post tomorrow night.

Saturday, October 15, 2005

It's sad O_o

Nobuddy thot my wawl maht jokes were funy.

BOOOOO! Stop making jokes, Quazimoto! Go back to the bell tower! Yaaarrrggghhhhhh!!!

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Humor from the past

Thanks for all the replies on the questions!! I'll do another one soon.

The other day I deleted the first yahoo! account I ever had. mcsuperskills at yahoo dot com. I've had that pretty much since I started using the internet. But it had become so overrun with junk mail, I quit using it. But, I had to go through the tons of saved messages to see if there were any I wanted to keep. Right off the bat, there were about thirty or forty of those questionnaires (sp?) that you send around to each other, with tons of questions about yourself. I deleted almost all of those, except for the ones from Cami. She's hilarious. But I also found a forward from my friend Jo. She's married to my friend Jamie (Jo is the girl, Jamie is the guy. funny.), and she just moved to Philadelphia from Morocco. Anyways, since it's hilarious and since going to walmart was the only fun thing to do in Milledgeville where we went to college, I though you all should enjoy this.

*************************************************
50 Fun Things to Do at Wal-Mart
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk really slowly, especially in thin aisles.
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.
11. Turn all the radios to polka stations; then turn them off and turn the volume up to full blast.
12. Play with the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi. I haven't seen you in so long." etc. See if they play along.
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this crap anyway?!"
15. Repeat #14 in the jewelry department.
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you are taking it for a test drive.
17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about 5 feet behind them. Do this until they leave the store.
18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
19. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow, magic!"
20. Take off your shoes and tell them you want to> return it and when they say you didn't buy it there say "Hmmmm....I thought the customer was always right!"
21. Move "Caution : Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you will only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch from other aisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."
26. TP as much of the store as possible.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.
29. When someone asks you if you need help, begin to cry and say, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between them yelling "Red Rover!"
31. Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any in stock. (i.e.: Shnerples)
32. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full-scale battle with G.I. Joe vs. X-men.
33. Take bets on the battle from above.
34. Test the brushes and combs in cosmetics.
35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission Impossible.
38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies."
41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
42. Two words: Marco Polo.
43. Leave Cheerios in lawn and garden, pillows in the pet section, etc.
44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's.
45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with various funnels.
46. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, drop to your knees and scream, "No, no, its those voices again."
49. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.
50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

*BONUS*
1. Attempt to do all of the above in the same visit, without getting kicked out.
2. Try to hold up customers with the toy guns. See how much you can make.
************************************************
Good times.

Wednesday, October 5, 2005

I'm getting lazy

I think I have writer's block. I keep wanting to post on here, but I can't ever think of what to write. So tonight, I will engage you, my 8 readers, to think.

Top 5 List
Episode 1
#1. Top 5 dream jobs (education and experience not required)
Two of mine are National Geographic Photographer and Hitman.

#2. Top 5 books that you think should be made into a movie.
My biggest one was Chronicles of Narnia, but they are doing that now, so...

Think hard about these and get back to me.

Sunday, October 2, 2005

I'm alive!!!!

I was dead for a while, but now I'm back.

I've been in Houston for a while. I was in a wedding and visiting some good friends that just moved out there. Probably by tonight or tomorrow I will post pictures and talk about it. It's good to be home, but I seriously don't want to go back to work.

Oh, and also, I love Fonzie.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Vanilla Sky is really depressing...

but i still like it. but it doesn't compare to 'abre los ojos.'

so i went out with a girl last night. I KNOW, RIGHT? it wasn't a date really. we were just hanging out. she's way cool. californian. i hope it works out. one thing i immediately like about her is that she has a total lack of drama about her. i have experienced some major drama queens thus far. and so now if i notice a lot of drama in a girl, that girl ceases to have any chance whatsoever. drama sucks. yo odio drama.

no big deal though. we went to see a movie. fantasic four. her pick. major cool points. you should have seen me. i was all nervous before she got there. and now i'm doing something silly to make her laugh. i have her sunglasses. her "rockstar" sunglasses. i'm either going to get her to go on a scavenger hunt to find them, or else i'm gonna take pictures of the sunglasses eating, or reading, or rockclimbing. and then i'm going to send her postcards FROM the sunglasses with pictures of them doing those things. and in the meantime, she's wearing my raybans, so lets all cross our fingers and hope she doesn't lose/break them. i even set up an email address for the sunglasses. hillarysrockstarsunglasses@yahoo.com. i know. i'm stupid.

sufjan stevens is playing at the 40 Watt tonight. i wanted to go so bad, but it was sold out. but, speaking of the 40 Watt, i got tickets for switchfoot, and me and rodger and will are going. and we are going to hang out with jon, tim and chad (and maybe jerome) after the show. and i'm stoked, not just because i'll be hanging out with them, but because we'll be in athens at 2am, and that's way fun.

i'm looking for a new job, so if anybody knows of anything, let me know. i would be willing to do partial nudity.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

O_o

i saw bree make this little face and i liked it, so there you go.
O_0
i have this married couple friends, jo (girl) and jamie (guy), and they have been in france and morocco for about two and a half years, and they just came home. they were here in augusta last night to have dinner with me and rodger and angela, and they told me they went to london for most of the summer before they came home. "what did you do there?" i queried. jamie says, "i drank beer. oh, and i ate pork." i thought he was kidding, but no that's what he did in london all summer. as we all know, morocco is an arab nation, and alcohol and pork are forbidden, and jamie, as skinny as he is, lost about 20 pounds because he couldn't drink beer. but, he did get some of his beer belly back over the summer (a very little bit of it), and i'm proud of him. and when i came for dinner last night, i brought him some honey brown and killians red. it was so good to see them i almost wet myself.
o_O
so, the other day i nutted up and called a girl. that was huge. and it went very well, so we'll see how that goes.
O_o
right now i feel very un-creative, because i just read the blog of these friends of bri's, and it was real funny and i don't feel funny anymore. so go read their blog. it will make you laugh. O_o

Saturday, September 17, 2005

they should call them humor cookies

I just got the funniest fortune cookie ever. It said, and I quote, "smile if you like this fortune cookie." I BUSTED OUT LAUGHING. I showed it to my buddy Mike, and he busted out laughing. And then Banda busted out laughing. It was a good one.

I hate working on Saturdays.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Long live the movie montage

I wish my life went in montages. Firstly I'm assuming that everyone knows what a montage is. You know in a movie where they want to show time passing or a bunch of stuff quickly, they'll play a song and show a lot of different things happening, and you don't hear talking, you just hear the music and see the stuff happening. Well, there's always music playing in my head, so why should my life just be a long montage. It would mostly be slow, sad music, because that just makes me feel better. Probably the song that would be playing: "Skin" by Vigilantes of Love. The song is perfection, and it's mostly about Van Gogh, and it's awesome. If you don't know who VOL is, get into them. It's a band started about 20 years ago by Bill Mallonnee, and after a three or four year hiatus, they are getting back together, and I'm about to pee my pants because they rule. They played this past Friday night in Athens, GA at the 40 Watt (legendary bar, don't even ask, owned by Peter Buck of R.E.M.), and I wanted to go, but none of my friends were excited about it, so whatever. Either that song, or maybe "I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You" by Colin Hay (Garden State Soundtrack). Colin Hay used to sing for Men at Work (you know, they guy with the lazy eye, the song "Who Can It Be Now?")

Anyway, I've been in this mood lately. I know, right? I'm always in a mood. I was sitting in kinship group last night (kinda like Bible study, and yet not), and I was thinking to myself, "I wish I could just put on an invisibility cloak and walk around, not just here at group, but everywhere." I go through these periods where I just don't want to be around anyone, and then a couple of days later I have to get a bunch of people around me so I'll feel better. You know I wish my life WERE a movie. It might make more sense.

Rodger prayed for me and said he felt like I was standing at the side of a rapid with my kayak, watching the water rush by and was too afraid to jump back in again. Probably because of past failures and mistakes and stuff. And wow, did that hit me like a ton of bricks in the chest. My head was swimming, I was coming up with so many ideas of what the river could be (girls, job, life, church, etc.) Oh, and funny story. Earlier I blogged that I had something about me that I felt was my "long nose." I'll recap. Cyrano had the long nose, and I have something about me that I'm embarrassed of, and I call it my Cyrano (but it's not my nose). I know that's confusing but anyway at kinship last night, someone sort of "complimented" the thing that I think is bad. Just out of the blue. Will and I got a good laugh. Sigh. Sometimes I think I'm clinically insane. And sometimes, I'm just hungry. Also, I think maybe I'm a mental hypochondriac. I don't think anything is physically wrong with me, but maybe I have mind cancer. I'm joking.

Before I go, my friend Andrew and I just watched the movie Crash. If you haven't seen it, i DEMAND that you stop whatever you are doing right now and go watch it. Right now I feel like a racist bastard.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Sunday morning...

"sunday morning rain is falling..."

even though, at this point in my life, i DETEST maroon 5, i can still appreciate the fact that they had some good songs. unfortunately, that album represents a weekend that i would looooooovve to forget, and so, i can't listen to it anymore. i sold my copy to a cd store. ah well.

so, i got off of work at three yesterday, went home, showered, put on fresh garments, etc, etc, went to a sports bar to watch about three hours of a football game that nearly gave me a heart attack. why do i do this? i don't know. we didn't blow them away like we should have, we actually barely won. i'm sitting in a room full of grown men and women, with 12 different football games on, and i'm screaming. AT THE TV. nachos, beer, and yelling. i've come to the conclusion that we men are silly. we are silly men and we do silly things. but we have fun. unless we are losing. then we are just spending money.

new roommate has moved in, finally. he's already been more fun in 2 days than the old one was in four months. so, good times for the hotel. (the hotel is the name of our house...sweet, eh?)

a quick note on phone messages before i go. why do people get so uptight about leaving a message. "hey, i called you earlier." "did you leave a message?" "no...it wasn't imp-" "WELL if you didn't leave a message then why would i call you back?!" "because it wasn't imp-" "I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE DON'T LEAVE MESSAGES!!" "ok." i've had this conversation many times, in many varying forms. virginia and i have this conversation a lot, but she just likes to pick on me. she doesn't get upset like SOME people do. so, attention universe: i may call you, and if it's not important and you don't answer, i'm not gonna leave a message. if i'm calling you to ride to the grocery store, i'm not gonna leave a message. if i'm calling you to go on a date, i probably will leave a message. i make no apologies, and i will not change, so NYAH!

i think i'm going to start saying the word "ruddy." you know, the way british people use it. kinda the way they say "bloody," but instead it's "ruddy." but i'll wait til the next post so i don't weird anybody out.

oh, and hey meredith! :)

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Dawgs vs. Cocks today...

5:30 kickoff. spurrier is gonna get his @$$ handed to him. that's ALL i'm gonna say.

Saturday, September 3, 2005

Fung Schway

I know that's not how you really spell it.

So, we kicked my roommate out. It was awesome. Not really. But he's gone. And our buddy Michael (that's Sergeant Michael to you) is moving in. Only right now, he's at PLDC (sergeant training) at Ft. Benning, so his girlfriend and my homey Hazel has been moving him in and setting his room up. And that got me realizing. I've been in my house since May 20! It's high time I changed my furniture around in my bedroom! So I did that last night. It was an undertaking to be sure. I have to do it every four or five months, just to keep stuff fresh. And it has to look awesome, and it doesn't necessarily have to be practical (i was about to put my couch diagonally in the middle of the room). So but I got it done basically. It looks pretty good. It'll do. But Hazel and VAKing are right...I have a LOT of stuff. Good thing my bedroom is huge.

You know, I'm a jerk. I realized that I don't read and post on other blogs NEARLY as much as anybody else. So I'm gonna work on that. I promise. I am reading you guys' stuff. I swear.

I got my plane ticket. Will and Sarah, I love you. I'm flying out of BIRMINGHAM to save $100 dollars. I'm also having my wisdom teeth out in two weeks. YIKES. I hate needles. Needles and snakes. Somebody mentioned needles and snakes in the same sentence the other day. My brain imploded, I freaked out so bad. (That's why this post is so stupid)

Um, watch the movie American Splendor. You won't regret it. Also, I'm currently reading some awesome comic books. New Avengers is awesome.

The Georgia Bulldogs kick off their season today in Athens against Boise State. GGGGo Dawgs.

Oh Bri, guess what? I watched one of my videos from the Creek last week. It was awesome. I was helping a buddy set up his camera and computer and we ended up talking about it and I showed it to him. It made me think of you. And yeah, I probably do owe you money. What's $10 with five years interest?

Monday, August 29, 2005

liberate te ex texas

"save yourself from texas"

i have to fly to texas next month, and i can't afford it. i think i'll drive. hmm. NOW i wish i wasn't in this wedding, but oh well. and i've got to rent a tux. and i've got to have my wisdom teeth out. and i owe about 6 people money. well, 2. but it might as well be 100.

and...i need a haircut.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

dangit

(1)i HATE it when friends start a conversation, and then decide they don't want to have it, and try to ignore the fact that they started it :)

(2)if anyone has any (or knows anyone that has any) original issues of GI Joe made by Marvel Comics, let me know. i'm on the prowl.

(3)my friend virginia just got back from 10 days in peru. my friend conor is leaving thursday for jerusalem for three months. oh, and DOTTIE left and moved back to freaking CAIRO, EGYPT and did NOT call to say GOODBYE. i hope you have jet lag (we missed you in kinship). i hang out with world travelers, yo.

(4)hunting season starts october 22, and i am excited. now, THERE is a news flash for some of you. i live in the south. i am NOT a redneck, i hate country music, and i don't dip or chew or anything. i listen to indie and hardcore and hip hop, i like coffee houses and i don't wear shoes unless i have to, i don't EVER wear cowboy boots, thank God (haha amanda), i have stickers on my hatchback car...yes all this, and i hunt deer. i'm sorry if that skewers some of your opinion of me. in self defense, i hunt for the food, not for the sport, and we even give some to homeless groups, but i make no excuse. i enjoy it. i'm also playing golf on saturday. mwaaahahahaha!

(5)"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." -c.s. lewis

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Sounds Familyre

this is a downer post.

i spend a lot of time daydreaming. sometimes it's about silly stuff like g.i. joe and astronauts and stuff. sometimes it's more about life, like girls and marriage, and friends and family, and about leaving. tonight i was driving across town and started daydreaming about leaving. just, you know, going away. going to colorado, to a town i don't know with faceless people in it, who don't know me and whom i don't know. just being there in the perfect colorado weather, free and quiet and living. very still. no history.

it exploded in me this intense sadness that i don't understand. and i welled in me a consuming desire, but for what, i don't know. i don't want to leave, or be alone. but all of the sudden i can't shake it.

maybe it's just a desire to be out there and doing something cool. maybe it's a desire to not have anyone know anything about you, to be the "mystery." maybe it's a desire to try out a different name. pj, perhaps? who knows. it was very bizarre and it is still holding effect over me at this very moment, when i should be in bed.

you know, my mother is sad. not to say that she is a sad kind of person. she herself is just sad. i visited her yesterday, and she just cried and cried. she asked me a question that almost knocked me over. "do you have any idea what it would feel like to go just SEVEN days without physical contact of any kind?" she said that if she didn't get to hold and kiss her granddaughter (my neice), that she would never come in contact with anybody. my mom lives alone. she's had three shitty husbands and absentee friends. i live far away and my brother and sister-in-law are busy people, and are not much in the way of affection. my friends here give me grief when i go to see her, because it takes away time in which i could be hanging out. they hardly ever visit their parents (some of them are on the west coast), and it just doesn't make sense to them. my mom drives me nuts sometimes, but in my opinion, she is the absolute definition of love.

so, if anyone knows any nice, independently wealthy, late-50's/early 60's single men out there, let me know. (i'm kidding. do not contact me with this information.)

on another note (g flat, perhaps), i keep listening to more sufjan stevens. it is incredibly unbelievable how good "simple music" can be. it's mindblowing to be sure.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Mind Poop

I am so tired. And so hot. And so drained. It is HOOOTTTTTT down here. And I'm working outside in it every day. And I have a HORRIBLE sock line.

Also, my hair is getting really long and I'm growing a mustache. I'm not trying to be cool or anything. Actually I'm just trying to be funny and get a reaction out of people. It looks REALLY bad, especially since I can't really grow facial hair, so it looks even sillier.

OOHH!! 'THE SPY WHO LOVED ME' IS ON TV RIGHT NOW!

Anyway. So, I have finally realized what kind of dork I am. Everybody has some kind of dork in them. My roommate Sean likes Sci-Fi tv shows (bad ones) and plays computer video games like "Warlords Battlecry II" and "Dawn Destroyer." Actually I made that second one up but it sounds pretty cool. I'm going to have to use that somewhere. I'm picturing a new hair metal band...

So, everybody has something they nerd out with. Up until now I assumed I was free of this, but sadly no. I had forgotten this passion for a while but a coworker recently brought it out in me again. Here it is: I love comic books. I LOVE comic books. I've never really been a collector. In fact, the only one I've ever "collected" is GI Joe. I've loved GI Joe since a was a little boy (that's a long time), and I've got about half of the original 155 Marvel issues. So I was talking about it with my friend Monty at work, and he really REALLY loves comic books. He is an uber dork when it comes to that. He's totally normal when he's not on comic books, but he SUBSCRIBES to about 40 different ones. So, yeah, he's got me reading some and I realized that I want to get back into them, so I am. New Avengers, Wolverine, Ultimate Fantastic Four (complete with zombies), Green Lantern, Superman and Batman, and of course, GI Joe. Judge me if you want, but you all dork out at something, and it's not like I go to conventions or anything.

New topic.
Question: I don't date this girl anymore, and I don't want to have anything to do with her. But she still wants to be friends. I don't want to call her and TELL her to quit trying to call me-

WATCH OUT BEHIND YOU, BOND!! Oh that car is so cool.

-because then I would have to talk to her. Should I send her anthrax? No? It's driving me crazy! As of an hour ago, SEVEN calls in 10 days. AND she just tried to IM me. I'm like, "catch on faster!"

OK well...I guess anthrax would not be good. Or legal.

The 40-Year-Old-Virgin is out this weekend. Everybody go see it. Also, unless you suffer from complete paralysis and stupidity from the brain down, you should already have the new Nickel Creek album, "Why Should the Fire Die?" I hated it on the first listen, and I've loved it ever since. New Switchfoot and P.O.D. albums out soon, and if you are not already a fan of Sufjan Stevens, I'm going to send Will 'to pound you on the head with a tack hammer because you are a RE-tard.' (that was from Tommy Boy)

Thursday, August 11, 2005

[self-titled]

God?
yes?
what am i doing?
talking.
no, i mean in life.
you are living. experiencing.
why?
because i love you.
but why the pain? why the confusion?
confusion?
i don't know what i'm doing.
you do, too.
well, but i don't know what i'm supposed to do.
yes you do.
no...
yes.
...
live?
oh.
live...for me.
oh, well...yeah, i knew that.
i know.
and the pain?
part of life. you know that, too.
but for so long? so many times in a row?
yep.
girls? jobs? friends? s-
yes. all part of life.
over and over...
yes, because...
...
because...
oh! because I...um...
keep going.
because i'm not doing the right thing to...uh...
rectify?
yes, rectify...the, uh, situation...
the...pain.
yes, the pain.
hurt?
yes.
guilt?
um, yeah.
selfishness?
...
se-
YES.
...
...
you know what?
hm?
i don't care about all that stuff.
oh?
i mean, i don't like it, but...
but...but you don't hold it against me.
nope.
believe it or not, i love you.
do you?
don't I?
yes.
yes?
YES.
...
...
hey.
yes?
start acting like it.
like what?
like you know I love you.
i DO know that.
well act like it.
ok.
hey.
hm?
now.
oh. ok.
good.
hey.
yes?
thanks.
anytime.
****************************
there are times when we, as humans, are so hurt, so angry, so sad, so confused, so guilty (or, feel so guilty, i guess), that we can't see the answer, obvious though it may be. i remember high school, doing homework, working on a problem that was simple enough. but for some reason--boredom, girls, whatever--I couldn't figure it out. so i would go to my stepdad. and he would begin to walk me through it. and all-of-the-sudden, all of it would make sense, and I would answer before he could finish. because i had to just get out of my own way for a minute. go to someone else. someone smart enough to know the answer, and smart enough not to just tell me answer.

i wrote all of this at borders tonight. and then i went outside and walked through rain puddles.

oh, and if you see my friend jumi, tell her thanks for me. she is wise, for sure.

Monday, August 8, 2005

What a wonderful world we live in

You know, it's ok to have an insecurity or two.

Hypothetical situation: Let's say I have a long nose. I'm Cyrano. And I'm embarassed. I hate it and I don't want people to see it. OK, I'm sitting in a room with my fair lady, alone. I have on a mask. She wants me to take off the mask and I don't want to. She asks why, and I tell her because I am embarassed of my nose, not just at that moment, but always. Now, my fair lady tells me that I have no right to be embarassed because SHE doesn't think it's wierd, and that I have no right to feel insecure. Well, I say my fair lady is not the only person in the universe, and that OTHER people could see it, do you see? And besides, MFL doesn't have any of those things anyway. No blemishes, no scars or moles. That's why she's my FAIR lady, not my hag lady. So, I will keep my hideous nose concealed, or at least yell at MFL if she brings it up again.

Last night was awesome. Hilarious movie with some good friends. Card games. OhandIbeatmyroommateatarmwrestling! Ha! I didn't just beat him, I injured him. His arm STILL hurts today. That's right. I'm awesome. Oh, and I rule at spoons.

Congratulations to Sophia Sansbury. Her father, Will, is a good friend and fellow blogger (see the "I don't dance anymore" blog, to the right). Today, Sophia was dedicated at church. And, as it's also her birthday, there was a party for her today. It was hilarious watching her smash the cake with her hands and wipe it all over herself and her hair and her face and her highchair. Great times. Will and Sarah and awesome parents and have an amazing child. Oh, and for her birthday, she got this Thomas the Tank Engine book, and on the cover it looks like Thomas is giving this hot lady engine the "eye." So I thought it was about him getting a girlfriend, but no dice.

And so, alllllll my teacher friends are going back to school now, and they are all going to be grumpy next week, so I think I'm just going to bid them all farewell until next spring. So, John, Rodger, Angela, Sarah, Jason, Vianne, Brandon, Heather, Cami, Kelsey, Adam, Claudia, Miss Debbie, Dan and Leslie, have a good year, don't kill any kids, and I'll see you next summer.

Wednesday, August 3, 2005

A song

As I recall with my stomach turning
I was hiding away from myself, away from you
Like nothing, though something was terribly wrong
And I admit that I was only waiting for the right time
Night time, the right moment for you to look away
Though you never did, I pretended for a while
So I could walk where I don't belong

And I remember every word you said
Come back in time, come back
And I remember I would soon be dead
Now so pitiful, so pitiful

But I know as I hammered those nails into your beautiful hands
Your eyes still try to search for mine, but I look away
Now your eyes are the only thing that can save me
I'm still afraid of them piercing
You're breaking into my prison
Just pretended for a while
My soul is dying I won't look away

And I remember every word you said...
I'll remember every word you said
This time I won't look away
*******************************************
Man, those swedes are deep. This song is called "pitiful," and it's by a band called Blindside, and they are from Sweden. Their fifth studio album was released yesterday, and it's called "The Great Depression," referring to the great depression in our hearts before we find Christ. If you like hardcore rock, get into Blindside.

Peace

Tuesday, August 2, 2005

Long hot summer!

It's been so hot here. Three straight 100 degree days (115 with the heat index), and I work outside. Needless to say, I have a horrible sockline.

OK, first a quote, and then some monday words.

"I didn't go to religion to make me happy. I always knew a bottle of Port would do that. If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don't recommend Christianity." --C.S. Lewis

1. The Half-Blood Prince: That book is frickin awesome! And what I thought was going to happen, happened (see previous post). JK Rowling is in trouble.

2. Service: We talked about service in kinship tonight. I think I definitely need to work on my servant attitude.

3. Wisdom teeth: So my oral surgury benefits kicked in, so I can finally get my wisdom teeth out after nearly two years of waiting. But, it's still going to cost me $350. If you would like to donate to this fund, let me know.

4. Supervisor: My supervisor at work is on vacation this week, and I'm in charge. BWAA-HA-HA-HAA!!! >:)

5. Journal: I bought a new notebook to write in and take notes in, etc. It's black, and I bought it thinking that it was manly enough for me to buy, because it has a solid black cover. A few years ago, I had a journal with a dragonfly on it, and my friend Angela made fun of me. So, now I have to buy manly journals.

6. Lost Dogs: Pearl Jam has recorded about 7 or 8 albums since the phenomenal and groundbreaking release of "Ten" in 1991. Everytime, they have recorded songs that were very good, but for one reason or another, didn't get onto the album. Well, now they have released a double CD called "Lost Dogs" where they put 30 of their favorites from this category (this album includes "Last Kiss" and fan favorite "Yellow Ledbetter"). This album is amazing and I recommend it to everyone who enjoys good music. (Cool liner notes included)

7. Garden State Soundrack: Coldplay, The Shins, Iron and Wine, Frou Frou, and a personal favorite, Nick Drake. A tremendous album for an amazing movie.

8. Wedding Crashers: two words-hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

9. Contentment: I think for a while I am just going to focus on learning to be content with what I have been given and stop trying to get more. I think that is the key to me being able to move on with life and get out of the quagmire.

10. Road trip: Tomorrow, after work, I am taking my friend Jeff to North Carolina to look at a car that he may or may not buy. But we are going to have fun. And walkie-talkies.

11. Philemon: I studied this book the other day while I was drinking an iced Chai at Borders. I ended up having to make a huge list of people that I need to forgive. Hmm.

12. Friends: I've been watching seasons 4, 5, and 6. So great.

13. Marriage: In september, I'm going to be a groomsman at my friend Heath's wedding in Houston. And in March, I'm going to be the best man at my friend Tysen's wedding. This after years of being 'the wedding singer.' I'm stoked. But I have to buy a plane ticket to Houston, so again, if you wish to donate, let me know.

Before I go...

"The true Christian's nostril is to be continually attentive to the inner cesspool." --C.S. Lewis

Isn't he awesome? How do you think of crap like that??

PS - thanks to Rodger for the quotes.

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

I'm not dead

I've been really tired and busy lately, and on the move a lot, but soon (maybe as early as tomorrow evening), I will be back for updates. Plus I have a lot of stuff to talk about. So, you know.

Sara, I am determined to play literati. I won't take no for an answer. :)

Stay hydrated people. It was 115 degrees today with the heat index.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

OH the humanity...

Topic #1~I discovered tonight where I don't want to end up in life. Some friends from mine from church, a married couple, invited me to dinner. A year ago, I spent an entire day in a one-and-a-half foot crawl space under their new home. Fast forward to tonight. Dinner. Husband, wife, THREE daughters, ages 4, 3, and 2. Basically, a big henhouse, with one rooster. A banny rooster. I laughed and laughed and laughed. It was really awesome, and I had a great time, but...

I'm just not sure about this kid thing. I can only take children in small doses. Even the children that I love go away after a couple of hours. I'm sure I will want kids one day, but until then, HALLELUJAH SINGLEHOOD! But really, I had an awesome time, and Mike and Diana are amazing people and amazing parents.

Topic #2~I live in Augusta, GA. Home of the Masters. Home of Fort Gordon. And, home of the Medical College of Georgia. Now, I am good friends with quite a few of these FREAKS (my roommate is a nurse. Guy. Nurse Man. Murse. HAHA.). You should see them study. They do it EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. I don't get it. They just read and read and read. And learn. I didn't learn anything by reading. I can not tell you one single thing that I learned from reading. OK now obviously, I learned something from reading. But in relation to what I learned from life and from hands-on experience, there is no comparison. Like, I can't read instructional books, like Purpose-Driven Life, or some self-help book. Because it's not interesting. I hate text books. On the other hand, I just read Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire in 4 days. I read 450 pages on Sunday afternoon. I love novels. I love stories. I like to be moved when I read. I don't like to think. That's why I like movies so much. I know this makes me seem shallow, but whatever. I'm smarter than you. Just kidding.

I was really smart in kindergarden. Kindergarten? Whatever, anyway, I was REALLY smart. I was so smart, second week of school, Ms. Jeffers calls my mom for a parent teacher conference, and tells her that I could be moved up to first grade and be caught up by Christmas, but I was a trouble-maker. And I was. I was Hell dressed up in Jams and Keds. I set the Danielsville Kindergarden record for most paddlings in a year (averaged one every other day, seriously). I don't know how I made it to be such a well-mannered, well-bred, well-educated adult man. I was SMART. I was so smart, my teacher had a drawer in her filing cabinet filled with stuff for me to do, because I would finish in five minutes and get in trouble. I was so much trouble, one day I accidentally spilled a tiny bottle of blue paint at 8:05 in the morning. My teacher made me lay on my "nap towel" for the REST of the DAY. Bathroom and lunch was the only thing I was allowed to get up for. True story.

Topic #3~Don't make friends with dentists. You would think this is a good thing, because hey, free dentist. But no. They actually want to LOOK at your teeth. Now you're thinking, hey that's ok I have pretty good teeth. Have you ever seen dental students? Or dentists? I think the first pre-requisite to dental school is that you have perfect teeth. And so, 'good teeth' are not as good as you think they are. And they want to use you as a 'dental guinea pig.' Hey Pat, let me poke around in your mouth all weekend. And, ohbytheway, I'm going to know all your horrible dental secrets when I'm done. BWAAHAHAAHA!!!!!!

Sigh.

I haven't seen Fantastic Four yet, so don't tell me what happens. And I'm very angry because I think I just accidentally read a spoiler about the new Harry Potter book, and if what I read happens, JK Rowling is finished.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Some days...

there just isn't enough alcohol.

Monday, July 11, 2005

Apparently I'm a strong swimmer

I was listening to this cd the other day (the cd "Be" by Common), and on the last song the guy that was narrating was saying things like, "Be Content," and "Be Prosperous," and stuff, and all-of-the-sudden he says, "Be Proud, that you were the strongest swimmer out of 500,000." Now, THAT is funny.

It got me and Rodger and Angela talking, and Ang asked a very, VERY good question. If you were conceived at any other time, ten minutes earlier or later, or the next day, or with mexican food on the stomach instead of chinese, or if someone was drinking, or even if a different swimmer had reached the egg before you, would you be a different person? Would you look different? Act different? Be different? Rodger said yes, you would be totally different. But I say no. God took all that time putting us together and crafting us. We may look different, but our basics would be the same, i think. Personality, moods, etc. Basically our souls would be the same, just a different shell. Maybe. Because all of those things are defined by our circumstances anyway. Upbringing, home life, friends, schools, yadda yadda yadda.

It was interesting to say the least.

Oh, and congratulations to Rodg for finishing VLI. It was very tough and I'm proud of him.

Friday, July 8, 2005

oops

there was supposed to be an ending to yesterday's post. sorry. that sounded kinda dark and sad. it was SUPPOSED to say that i have been spending an ample amount of time by myself recently, both for good reasons and bad reasons. but that it was ok, because alone is not necessarily bad. and i've needed to get things done. it's just that sometimes the result of being alone is that you feel alone. and on those days, it sucks.

on another note...i feel verrrry popular because SIX people commented on my post from yesterday (well, five...thanks sara). and i don't know two of the others, but i'm excited anyway. i'm getting world-famous.

call your mothers and tell them you love them, people. now, back to work!

Thursday, July 7, 2005

Thursday words

There are words that sum up the past couple of days. Here they are.

1. Beck: This wierdo has a new album out called "Guero." This album is UN-believable! If you like good music, then you already like this album.

2. Weather Man: How do these morons get this title? For the last two weeks, every single day they've said it's going to rain before noon. But has it? No. Not a drop. Thanks a lot, Bob Smith.

3. Harry Potter: I've been reading all the books again to get ready for the new one to come out. That's right, I like Harry Potter.

4. Resume: I just redid my resume (thanks for your incredible help, Will!) because I just applied for a new job at Augusta State as an academic advisor.

5. Weed Eater: I got my weed eater from my mom's house and brought it down to Augusta. I spent two hours in the heat yesterday weed eating in my flip flops. It was awesome!!

6. Library: I've been checking out movies and books on tape from the library. All free. And I'm cancelling my Blockbuster Online membership. It was fun, but I don't make that much money and it's costing me a fortune. Well, not a fortune, but it always comes at a bad time.

7. Fear: I realized not too long ago that I've been living my whole life in fear. And I can't anymore. So I'm not. Hmmm.

8. Willy Wonka: Up In Arms, Old Hollywood!!! These people are spitting on your graves!! What is the point of making a new 'Chocolate Factory' when the old one was perfect?? I hope Gene Wilder beats the crap out of those people.

9. Mom: I love my mother to death. She is the best mother in the world. I give her a hard time, but she is perfect. She deserves more than the world has to give her.

10. Alone

Wednesday, July 6, 2005

one side note...

I hate money.

Mostly because I don't have any.

I think I'll write a song.

The end.

ooooffffffff!!!

Don't read this post.

So, you may not be able to tell by that awesome photo there, but I have, what doctors call, 'a little bit of a weight problem.' That is to say, I am gravitationally burdened. So, tonight I worked out ( I often run and do other non-couching type things), but only because I got a new pair of running shoes. Honestly, I don't know why I got Nike. I hate Nike. There were a pair of NewBalances there that were $10 cheaper and just as nice. Probably would have fit better, too.

When am I going to get it through my head that just because a shoe looks good on the shelf, that doesn't mean it's going to look good on my foot?!

On the other hand, I did get some new teva flipflops for $15.




!!!!

I am a materialistic bastard. Oh well, this is dumb and I'm sweating like mad cow. AND I think I just threw up a little bit, in my mouth.

Don't read this post.

Tuesday, July 5, 2005

Little Girl

I just spent an evening with my neice, Lilly Grace. At two-and-a-half years old, she jabbers as much as any full grown woman that I know.

All of the sudden it hit me. It's amazing how much I love this girl. Seriously. Most other children that would have spent an hour showing me all their toys, I would have gotten bored and left. But I couldn't get enough! I just kept asking her more questions and she just kept answering them...she's talky for sure. My brother said that the day before I was there, she was laying in her bed, before her nap, saying, "Uncle Pat is coming tomorrow," over and over. Of course, I get there, and the first thing she says is, "where's Granna?" Kids.

Also, my sister-in-law is pregnant with their second, a boy. John asked LillyGrace what she wanted to name the new baby, and she, of course, said, "frog." So, the new baby's name is Frog. So be it.

I just spent the fourth of July weekend with my mother, which was cool. More about that later. Also, my roommate Matt and my friend Ju Mi just got back from the Phillipines. Matt brought me a fricking butterfly knife. I almost peed a little bit.

Well, bedtime. Happy 229th, America. You aren't aging gracefully, but I still love ya.

Ps...I decided that the name of my blog isn't the 'desert island' thing anymore. Did you notice? Observant, no?

Friday, July 1, 2005

HAHAHA! Eat it, Supreme Court!!

I'm so proud of the House of Representatives right now, I could cry. (And Pelosi can kiss my tailfeathers) They passed a bill today (Friday) that all but nullifies the eminent domain ruling upheld by the Supreme Court this past weekend. (READ ALL ABOUT IT!!) In a nutshell, any governmenal body that engages in taking someone's home, they will lose federal funding.

Alright Senate, your turn.

General Viscerant Epheral Nerves?

GVE - 3, 7, 9, 10

Shout out to my third reader, Virginia. Welcome to the wardrobe door.

aLSO! I just connected with my good friend Bri Irwin, who lives in Kansas (beautiful state. congratulations.). "boulevard wheat girl" and I worked in colorado together. good times. her blog is now listed at the right side of the page, and it is good stuff. Bri, i guess, is now my fourth reader! I'm taking over the world!!!!

Thursday, June 30, 2005

I'm so embarassed!

I've done something so embarassing and repulsive, I don't even know if I should say it. I was having a conversation with my mother on my cell phone, and you know how that is. So anyway, I said something, and as soon as I said it, I realized it. Of course my mom didn't notice. It's bad because I try very hard not to sound hick-ish, being from the south and all. And so, I said something so grievous and hideous, I'm scared to put it out on the internet. Sigh...

So, here it is. Please don't judge me. After all I caught it right away and I felt just AWFUL. I said, and I quote, "Well, she can't never say we never gave her nothing." That's right. A QUADRUPLE NEGATIVE. The most hideous thing I have ever said, I think. In my defense, I was talking about my aunt. She and I don't get along that well, and if using a quadruple negative against someone is an insult, well then I just don't feel that bad about it. However, it still happened, and I think I'm going to be sick.

Well, eventually I will talk about Rodger, comic books, girls, and a new job, which William is helping me with (thanks, man), but not today. Today I feel like hammered dog poo.

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Eminent domain my butt

So, finally I'm pissed at our government. I mean, REALLY pissed.

Our government has made it legal to take whatever they want, no questions asked. YES I understand that they are paying (fair-market value? whatever.) , but if I wanted to sell my land, I would have freaking done it already!

Here's how it goes as I understand it. The city or county can seize any private land, as long as they can prove that it is better for the people. PRIVATE land. "Hey. We think we can use YOUR property better than you can. Give it to us. No? Oh yeah? We'll just see about that!"

I was talking to my friend about it, and he made a good point, and I agree. If they actually ARE using it for a reason where EVERYBODY benefits and nobody is really profitting (profiting? profitting? getting paid.), then that's ok. For example, if they need the land for a highway, or a dam to block water from flooding a neighborhood (in my friend's case), then that's ok. A highway benefits people, and nobody's making money off of it. But if they want to put up an office building or a Target, then some people will benefit in the way of jobs and convenience, but to most people it won't matter and a few men are making MILLIONS.

The problem with the city taking it is that they give you what THEY think the land is worth. They aren't even really giving you "free market value." You have no choice. Now if a big company wants to give you 20 times what it's worth, to me, that's ok. Yeah this land has been in my family for 120 years, but for $10 Million, I'll go deal with my grief in Barbados. And the big companies can do that, because they are pretty much allowed to spend whatever they need to get location, location, location. But the problem is, the big company can just say, "hey, instead of us paying $10 Million, let's get the city to get it for us!" So they go to the city council, tell them they can't get the land from John F. Publicguy, and the big bad city council says, "Well, hell, we can get that for you!" City council gets a donation from big company and envision huge property taxes for them to spend, and John P. barely gets rent money. This is actually happening! I linked an article below. Read it.

Honestly, I don't own land, but I was planning on buying some sooner or later. Now, what's the point? If the government can just come and take my land away from me without so much as a "how's your father?," then what good is it for me to buy land, expensively, might I add, and then LOSE money five years later when Hometown, USA wants to build a GloboGym. Way to go, Supreme Court! Now if I may be so bold....

"[The Proletariat's] mission is to destroy all previous securities for, and insurances of, individual property...

The distinguishing feature of communism is not the abolition of property generally, but the abolition of bourgeois property. But modern bourgeois private property is the final and most complete expression of the system of producing and appropriating products that is based on class antagonisms, on the exploitation of the many by the few.

In this sense, the theory of the Communists may be summed up in the single sentence: Abolition of private property."

-- Karl Marx and Frederick Engels, The Communist Manifesto

To quote Austin Powers, "yay capitalism." Lastly, a good read is this column by Neal Boortz at TownHall.com.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

The ONE Campaign

I got this email from Switchfoot (the band, you know) and this is pretty awesome, so I did it and I think everybody else should, too. Click on the link below and follow through. (It's just one page, a letter campaign)

Thanks, you two!

http://www.one.org/addmyvoice.aspx

Friday, June 17, 2005

Finally!

Well, I've finally moved into my new house with my two roommates. And I'm back on the internet. woo hoo.

I think i'm gonna come up with a new nickname for myself. Dump. Is that a good nickname? We'll see.

So my friend Dottie is reading all the way from Cairo. Egypt, not Cairo, Georgia. There IS a Cairo, Georgia. But she's in Egypt.

Anyways. That's it for now. I have to get back on my golf cart and "work."

Next issue: politics and comic books. and girls. and rodger.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

groggg!!

I am now working 6am to 3pm...it's actually good because i have more time for myself, but God doesn't even get up until 5:45, so why should I have to get up at 5am?? Oh well.

I like a new girl. I think. I don't know. We'll see.

Ps. Pedro the Lion 'effing rocks!! They are playing in Atlanta on May 15 and I'm going, even if i have to go by myself. So ha.

Friday, April 22, 2005

the Winter of my discontent

I hate girls. Well actually I love girls, but I'm not very happy with your gender as a whole right now, ladies. Not to say that we dudes are awesome, but what the hell?

So, now I know what it feels like to have your heart ripped out of your chest (a la Indiana Jones), thrown down on the floor and kicked around like a soccer ball. THREE TIMES. Yes, three girls have done this to me. I've given as well as I've taken, but I don't deserve this. This is sixth-circle-of-hell type stuff.

Anyway, job: good. Girls: bad. Money: pretty good. Car: hanging in there. Living situation: soon to be improving!

Hopefully, I can learn contentment, and once I do that, I will find what I'm looking for.

Thursday, April 7, 2005

Geezz...

It's only been a month and already i'm forgetting to do this.

I just spent four days in Chapel Hill, NC. HEELS!!! It was crazy. Some friends of mine are thinking of starting a church there. ChapelHill is crazy, and very amazing. Walking around campus at night reminds me of Milledgeville, where I went to school, but moreso of my hometown Athens, GA. Athens is much, MUCH cooler than Chapel Hill, but they are trying. Nice restaurants, cool people, beautiful women.

But one sad thing I noticed. Everybody was walking around with their I-pods on. My friends and I kept thinking, how do people get to know each other if they are spending all of their time self-involved and introverted? It made me kinda sad. Not that Ipods aren't cool, but seriously...

So my birthday was this past sunday. And happy birthday to me, the girl that I thought I wanted to marry told me, two hours before my birthday, that she no longer wanted to be with me, that "that's just not where her heart is." So you know. It's a whole long story that needs many more drinks, so I wont bore you with it.

I did read Catcher in the Rye yesterday and today. It was amazing. And I'm starting a Joseph Conrad novel called "Nostromo." Never heard of it? Think you may have? Well not only is "Nostromo" a Conrad novel, but it is also the name of the ship in Alien (Sigourney Weaver's ship).

I also just watched the movie "Saved." I've never gone to a Christian school, but my roommate has gone to three, and he said that, while funny, it's not a very accurate look at Christian school life. I did notice, however, that it's a good look at Christian life in general. It's sad that so many people that claim the same faith that I do have to act so damn stupid.

Anyway, I'm depressed because of the girl, so I'm gonna go to my birthday party now.

Wednesday, March 9, 2005

hail mary! what's up?

bet you don't know where the title of this blog came from.

right now, i'm in one of those funks...the kind where they show you in a movie montage, lying around, smoking a cigarette, staring into space, sitting alone in a bar with the rest of the people moving around at warp speed, walking down a dirt road, pondering life, all while some slow, piano-laced, vocally heartbreaking indie-pop song plays on...

the thing is it looks great in a montage, but it feels like crap. my head hurts a lot.

so, i've started writing a book. a novel. i've been inspired by steve martin. i just finished reading his second novel, and i must say i'm drastically impressed with his innate sense of storytelling. i wonder how you do that. if my book is ever to be that good, i will have to redraft it about a thousand times. plus, my story needs work.

so, in this blog i'm starting two trends:
1) shorter blog (my first ones were way too long)
2) desert island, all time top-5. every week, here and on MySpace, i'm going to put up a top-5 question, and see what people's answers are. nobody reads this one yet, except will, so hopefully this will draw some people here. or just make me look like a dork.

And here goes:
Week 1
Top 5 countries you would be from if you were not from the U.S. (or whatever country you are from) and why? (Fake places like middle earth and narnia don't count)

Here are mine:
1. scotland/ireland-cool language, clothes, beer
2. switzerland-neutrality, chicks, mountains, skiing, knives
3. brazil-amazing land, beaches and mountains, excellent food
4. japan-martial arts, food, all the jobs
5. austrailia-surfing, land, boomerangs

I hope this catches on.

Monday, March 7, 2005

tommy boy and my collegiate weekend

right now i am listening to a mix of jack johnson's new album "in between dreams" and a perfect circle's new cover album called "emotive." if you think maynard can't sing, a) you are a moron and 2) listen to track number 12, a cover of joni mitchell's "fiddle and the drum." and kick yourself.

so, in Tommy Boy (number 3 on my list of top 5 funniest films), at the point where tommy and richard are getting drunk, and they are puking under the billboard, richard makes a profound statement. now i noticed this statement as soon as he said it the first time i saw the movie, but to this day, i have never met one person that noticed this comment.

richard said, and i quote, "it's fish in a barrel my friend. the town's the fish, the people are the barrel. bang! fish in a barrel." no one has ever noticed why that comment was hilarious. i try to explain to people that he said it backwards, and all i get is dumbfounded stares. it's called intellectual humor, people. read books.

oh btw, i caved. i put the "i heart my hoopty" sticker on back of my car. yeah, now the symmetry is off and my car is driving like it's slanted to the right.

so, i just finished the most college-y weekend i've had in about 5 years (i graduated from college in may 2002 after a six year stint). this weekend was more collegiate than most weekends i had when I was IN college.

--friday night: friday was my roommate's birthday, as i said two days ago. well, i and seven friends, including said roommate, piled into his folks' awesome 15-passenger van with a "smile jesus loves you" tag on the front of it, and off we went to atlanta (we are in augusta). the sole purpose of this trip was to go to a restaurant, and we left at 10 after six, meaning we got there at 8:20 pm. at 9:05 we were seated, and proceded to eat the best fajitas this side of the mississippi river. oh btw, we had a dvd player in the van. i know, right? we left the restaurant at about 11 (i'm now driving), and instead of going home, we UNwisely decided to go to dave & buster's. not too shabby but very crowded. don't forget, i'm in the unemployed column right now and have just spent about 40 moneys. so after we leave dave & buster's, we leave atlanta at 5 minutes after one a.m. headed back to the golf capitol of the world. bed time: 4:35.

--saturday: i wake up at 11:45. i don't really do anything all day, although a few of us went to happy china to eat lunch. OH! we did watch Shaun of the Dead, which i will be adding to my list soon because that movie is oh so hilarious and not scary (i don't like scary movies...remind me to tell you my horrible story about my horrible friends and the blair witch project). then i go over to my friends rodger and angela's house. we watch "reality bites (number 2 on my all time top 5 movies)" and drink beer and eat cookies. and here's the best part. after that, we get cigars and more beer, and sit outside smoking and drinking and asking each other top 5 questions until 3 am. i LOVE rodger and angela, and we haven't gotten to really hang out in a while. this is one of the best nights i've had in a few years.

--today: mostly regular. i played guitar at church this evening (drums this morning), but tonight, seven of us, including one of my favorite bloggers, will, went to wild wing cafe and drank and ate wings and did more top 5-ing of each other.

i love weekends like this.

ps...number 2 dream job: photographer for national geographic. sigh.

Friday, March 4, 2005

well, day 1 sucked...

On to day two. I'm sure I'll get the hang of this.

So, today is my roommate's birthday. Tonight we are taking him to Atlanta to Pappasito's, which is much cool, but I don't have a job right now (see yesterday's blog debacle) and so this seems asinine. But he's my friend and there's eight of us going, so, who am I to be "that guy?" Besides, Pappasito's has the best fajitas on the planet. Hope to see you there.

Speaking of birthdays, tomorrow, my best friend from high school is turning 27. He just got married two or three weeks ago. He is much cooler than I am, just as he was in high school. I would never tell him this, but he ended up being the kind of guy I wanted to be. LOTS of friends, successful, but not rich. Just, enough that he doesn't struggle. It's not that I'm jealous of him by any means. You just spend your days thinking, if I had made just a few different choices, I could probably find what he has. I'm proud of him though. I always knew he'd make it.

I think I matured too late. Everyone else was figuring themselves out around the 2nd or 3rd year of college, and I may not have gotten there until after my sixth year (yes, six...i've got $23,000 worth of loans to prove it). I was talking with Jeff the other night (he's my pastor and one of my closest friends), pouring out about how I felt like a failure because I'm a 26-year-old college graduate with no job after just finishing a year working in a paint store. "Pat, there are college graduates who are homeless, and some that have much worse things going on." Leave it to a pastor to rain on my pity party.

I'm just tired of feeling unsuccessful.

**********************************************
When I sat down on the bed next to you
You started to cry
I said, maybe if I leave, you'll want me
To come back home
Or maybe all you mean, is leave me alone
At least that's what you said

You're irresistible when you get mad
Isn't it sad, I'm immune
I thought it was cute
For you to kiss
My purple black eye
Even though I caught it from you
I still think we're serious
At least that's what you said

-"at least that's what you said" by Wilco
**********************************************

sigh...day 1. I'll probably suck at this.

well this is my first. i know it will suck. i'm going to have to fake it.

wanna hear a jacked up story? i thought you'd never ask. so about a month ago, I was offered a better job than the one i currently had (delivering paint for a paint store). the new job was most good, too, because it's an environmental company and i would be saving the planet and junk.

so anyways, johnny newjob is like, "hey, come work for me." and i'm like, "alright." so, i put in my two weeks notice at the paint store, saying that my last day would be friday the 25th of february (yes i spelled february right, slackers) and not to cry for me because i was moving on to bigger and better things. lo and behold, friday the 25th comes and goes, monday the 28th comes and goes, etc, etc. now, keep in mind, kids, that this guy told me he would call me. he was like, "when's your last day?" and i was like, "friday the 25th."

and he was like, "ok i will let you know this weekend (the weekend BEFORE my last day)."

and i was like..."ok."

so he never calls. so i start filling out applications. and i'm like, filling them out EVERYWHERE. i applied for EIGHT (8) jobs at MCG. i'm applying at cell phone stores, banks, "organization automobile", strip clubs (they said i didn't have the legs). finally yesterday i throw out my pride and call him. he's like, "oh hey man. i've got all of your applications and stuff right here. let me look over them and i'll call you back." that was 2 o'clock wednesday. nothing.

so i've filled out about 25 applications, i've got friends hunting all over the place. and i just got a $197 phone bill because those bastards at cingular are facists (and i used up all my rollover minutes...my new phone is the junk, for sure)! AND i'm only getting about half of the taxes back that i thought i was getting (but i'm getting back over $800 so really i have nothing to complain about). but i gotta get my hoopty fixed, so....

speaking of being neurotic, i got a sticker from my boy Jason Harwell tonight, but i couldn't put it in the back window of my car because it would throw off the symmetry of the stickers that are already on there. my roommate thinks i'm nuts.hmmm...

i just told my friend mike that his mom is so fat that she puts on her belt with a boomerang. he's crying.

********************************
the poison makes its way through my body slowly
into the pleasure centers of my brain
if you were here i would admit that i'm an asshole
but now it's over and i can't stay sober
though it isn't like i've tried

on the front porch or on an airplane on vacation
or out for dinner in a nearby town
i was so proud just to have you sitting with me
but now it's over and i can't stay sober
pour and swallow follow one drink with another
i'll keep on til you agree to come back over
or until there are x's on my eyes

my old man always swore that hell would have no flame
just a front row seat to watch you true love pack her things and drive away
-"the poison" by pedro the lion
***********************************************